Babies don't Keep

We just returned from a trip to Indiana with a two-fold purpose: take Secunda to a couple of appointments with her Riley endocrinologists and visit my folks. Secunda has recovered well from her surgery; is now walking on her own - even running some with her brothers and sisters. My guilt was assuaged somewhat when I took Quarta to the Doctor with knee pain and he related an anecdote of a 13-year old girl he diagnosed with a slipped growth plate who had already seen three doctors and spent five weeks "rehabilitating" at a Sports Medicine Clinic for thigh pain. The Dr. told me not to feel badly - even doctors miss this.

While in Indiana I sat in my father's over-size rocker/recliner to watch a television program. Quinta, my 5 year old daughter, our youngest child, crawled into my lap. So I got to rock my baby! And gently cry. I have a cross-stitch sampler I had always intended to stitch and frame above my rocking chair, but life intervened with my plans and it never got done.

Cleaning and scrubbing can wait 'til tomorrow,
For babies grow up we've learned to our sorrow.
So quiet down, cobwebs! Dust, go to sleep!
I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep.

I once again got to rock my baby, and I'm a calmer woman for it. Even Secunda's good appointments didn't do as much for my heart as that five minutes in the rocking chair. It goes by so fast. Soon she'll be eleven and we'll be discussing menarche in the van on the way to Girl Scouts (the conversation between Secunda and me this week). Babies don't keep. Rock yours if you can.

Less Than Adequate

My daughter Secunda has been complaining of leg pain off and on for well over a month now. I dismissed it as "growing pains" because she takes growth hormone shots (every night, without complaint - this child is strong as well as sweet). Finally, her regular walk became a sailor's roll, she was limping so badly. Her pediatrician ordered x-rays, which showed the growth plate in her left hip had slipped. This is akin to an elderly person falling and breaking a hip. We were referred that week to a pediatric orthopedist at Riley Hospital for Children (since that's where her endocrinologists are). He examined her on Thursday, said she'd need surgery on Friday. She now has a pin in each hip (because kids with endocrine issues are at a 70-80% greater chance of this happening with the other hip) and is hopping around with a walker. Secunda is recovering well: mommy less so. The guilt at making my daughter live and walk with such pain is eating away at me.

But wait! There's more to feel guilty of! Because Secunda and I were in Indiana at the hospital, I was unable to do any shopping for my son Tertio's 8th birthday Sunday. We pretty much live paycheck to paycheck. We had budgeted for birthday, in a manner of speaking, but had not budgeted for hospital stay. On a birthday, the child gets to choose our meals for the day and with dinner we have cake and ice cream and gifts. Tertio wanted Chester's fried chicken for supper - we could no longer afford that. We had a meal which he wouldn't eat, a home-made cake which wasn't his favorite, no candles, no ice cream, no gifts. He was very disappointed. And I felt very guilty.

Tertio was made happy again, and my guilt assuaged, with the promise of a "do-over". With our next paycheck, we celebrate his birthday again. He chooses the meals again and this time we have all the things he missed on his birthday. If only there was a "do-over" available for Secunda. She has forgiven me for waiting so long to get help for her, because she is a strong, sweet child. However, I still feel the guilt. God help me.

God's Goodness

"...in thy goodness, O God, thou didst provide for the needy."

My husband's employer gave a small bonus this year. I immediately thought "Christmas!" and proceeded to spend it. The rest of his check was spoken for, of course, with everyday bills. I did not go wild: each child gets only three gifts, but with five children... plus, I didn't want to be in town Christmas week, so the bulk of the money went for three weeks of groceries. I reached the end of the bonus before I reached the end of the shopping.

So. I have two godparent gifts and my mother-in-law left the day before I meet the girls in my Mom's Group for our Christmas Outing. We usually get a little ornament there; so one of the godparents' gifts would be taken care of. I run the Secret Sister Program - so I wouldn't be getting anything from that corner, I THOUGHT. But in His goodness, God provides for the needy. I received three gifts that day, parts of which I could re-gift to my mother-in-law, and one of the ladies made a sweet craft for everyone - which went to the other godparent!

I had worried about the food lasting us until the next paycheck, then remembered the Lion's Club in their kindness always gives us a box at Christmastime. But it turns out, Bill had called to say we got a bonus this year and to please give our box to someone who needs it more. So. God in His goodness, will take care of the needy. I can hardly wait to see what He has in store!

Happy Birthday, Baby

My baby is five! That's right. Today Quinta, my youngest child, turns five years old. I spent six months on bedrest to get this child full-term. She was worth every minute. I had a caesarean section to deliver her. She was worth every anxiety. There were complications with her delivery and I ended up with a hysterectomy. She is greater than my wishes for more children.

This sweet child on her fifth birthday is a bright shining jewel: a tremendous blessing from God. She fills our lives with laughter and dancing. I am more grateful than she can know for her very being and her being in OUR family. I love you, Sugar. Happy Birthday, Baby!

Thank Goodness!

Today I received, via US Mail, an early birthday present. My husband ordered it for me at my request. I've been waiting anxiously for it to arrive because my devotions and daily writing had come to an end until it came in. You see, recently I filled up my journal; where I write my thanksgivings and hopes; where I jot thoughts on my morning and evening devotions. So I finally received a new Gratitude Journal. It has a nice layout, with good questions to help me recall the day and all the good that happened. My birthday's in a couple of weeks, so I was able to justify to myself buying the same journal I had even though it's a bit pricey and a simple notebook would suit the purpose.

I must also mention how very thankful I am for my family. I tend to get migraines; my children are very understanding about being quiet and keeping the lights low. My husband waits on me hand and foot. So last night I developed a migraine. Bill took over making the meatball subs for supper; my son Tertius finished his project in the living room and turned the lights down; Secunda helped ensconce me on the couch. After supper we turned on the tv to watch "The Biggest Loser". (I went to high school with Allen, one of the contestants, so even with a migraine I didn't want to miss an episode.) My daughter Quarta spent the entire two hours brushing my hair and occasionally putting her cool, sweet hand on my brow, which made my whole body relax. She is an extremely loving child and she sure showed it last night. I am so blessed and so thankful.

Homeschooling ABCs

Recently Terri Johnson, of Homeschooling ABCs held a promotion. She sent the first five (of 26) lessons for free to those who expressed interest. We were then to comment on her blog our thoughts on each lesson. Twenty-five people would be randomly selected to get the rest of the lessons free, etc.

As I finished up my last post on the last lesson, I prayed. "Dear God, I have found these lessons to be helpful. If You think the rest would be helpful to me, You're going to have to see to it that I win the rest of the lessons. Because You know no matter how reasonable the price, we can't afford to buy them."

The drawing was held September 1, and guess whose name was on the list?! God is faithful. I'm looking forward to getting the rest of the lessons. They're short, packed with information and useful even for a "veteran" homeschooler like myself.

Claim His Victory

My devotion book is currently a thick little thing called God's Promises and Answers For Women. Small sections with a heading and Bible verses to go along with that heading. This morning I came to: God Blesses Women When They... Claim His Victory.

I thought, "What a Protestant thing: claim His victory." But in actuality it's not. Because God is victorious - in everything! We have only to enjoy His creation, accept His promises, await His coming. These things are for all who believe in Him.

"For God is the king of all the earth....God sits on His holy throne....He is greatly exalted." (Psalm 47:7-9) Claim His victory.