Too excited to Sleep

It's after 5 a.m. and I haven't slept at all. The house is quiet except for the clicking computer keys and occasionally the bell of a cat. We're going back to Mass tom.....today! after a long time away for various reasons. Going as a family. I can hardly wait.

To see my Eucharistic Lord again....the only other time I remember being this excited was the night before my wedding.

Fear Not the Night

There will be no more from Fear Not the Night. John Kirvan, the author, has written several books concerning Muslim, Jewish, and Christian Spirituality. Perhaps this is why he shuns the Incarnation. He mentions Christ once, as a side note in a long discourse on the devil, on Day 23. I believe St. John of the Cross mentioned the Reason for our being much earlier. So. On to the next study.

Fear Not the Night Day 10

If we do not bring passion under control it will eat us alive and in the end be the only thing that lives in our souls. If we do not kill it first, it will kill us after making us spiritually sick.

The cure for this is to our lives single-mindedly to God; once agaain there will be peace.

Restore What is Mine.

When my steps are driven by passion, every attempt to practice virtue becomes a sad burden. I am dying. Renew my strength and energy.Restore my sight. Turn my life back to You with single-mindedness. Take away the subtle lure of the dark.

Amen.

Fear Not the Night Day 9

Passion is blind, and it blinds our souls when we surrender to it. It's a light outshining all others, darkening our intellect. But the draw of passion's light makes us blind to the other Light around us.

We Stumble in the Dark When Light is All Around us.

I don't want to grope my way in the dark; please allow me to see the True Light of Your Love.

Fear Not the Night Day 8

I find myself tortured and afflicted at the hands of a powerful captor, my passions. Like Sampson, in the hands of my enemies I am weak, blind, tormented.The greater the number of my passions, the greater the torment. But God refreshes if we just go to Him. "Come to me all of you labor and are burdened. I will refresh you and you will find rest for your souls."

Come To ME

It is time for me to lay down the passions that torment and torture me. Refresh my spirit and give me rest, I pray.

Fear Not the Night day 7

What does St. John of the Cross mean when he speaks of "passions"? As I read ahead I think his intention is to address worldly desires - they sap our energy, leaving us too tired to walk with God.

I understand small, unreasonable, demanding children; St. John compares my desires with these impossible to please children. They're never satisfied.

We get weary trying to fulfill our desires; we cannot find peace or rest or God.

Lest we Grow Too Weary...

I am so weary! From a quest to fill an empty heart and mind with things. More clutter. It means being surrounded by a cacophony of books and music, exploding drawers and toys on the floor. It means going to bed exhausted and waking tired.

"Come to me all you who are weary and heavy-laden; and I will give you rest. For my yoke is easy and my burden light." He doesn't say we'll rest forever; but when we're refreshed by His Presence, there's work to be done. Thank you, dear Lord , for keeping me just busy enough to prevent the fear from forming.

Fear Not the Night Day 6

The purpose of the journey upward (see:Moses) is to be alone with the Lord; no distractions or other passions. Until our passions are eliminated we will not arrive at the top, no matter how much virtue we practice.

Leave Everything Behind

If I am to make this journey to meet,talk, and join with You I must bring nothing with me. The purpose of the journey is to be alone with God with nothing but the desire to be with Him.