New Year, New Goals

The beginning of a new year. I used Jen Fulwiler's  Saint Generator, and was chosen by St. Paul the first Hermit. His patronage is of the clothing industry and weavers. Fascinating, as  I hope to include sewing and woven jewelry into my projects this year.

I also used Jen's Word of the Year Generator. My word is PURPOSE. I love it! I know my purpose is to get my family to Heaven and my chief commitment is to family and home. I pray daily that my kids...anyone...may only see Christ when they look at me. And now that I'm healthy and have energy I can bring order and peace to our home.

My purpose is also to be a fitting helpmeet to my husband. I feel a great urge to pray with him daily and to do more to help with expenses. I hope to make a boatload of sellable crafts and set up a booth at craft fairs, bazaars, etc. As I get more proficient with more complex items I may set up on Etsy - but that will be a few years down the road. I'll need to start small and build up. I'd like to recruit some of the kids to work with me and perhaps pay them with the proceeds. That too will take some time. We'll see how it goes.

I also chose a Focus Word: LEAN. Since gastric bypass surgery I've lost about 80 pounds. I continue to lose weight and am determined to reach my goal of 135 pounds by April 13th (one year out from surgery). About 30 pounds to go - it is doable. I wish to exercise daily; core exercises every other day with other targeted areas on the off days. A walk daily with Bill and the therapy pool as often as possible. My body will get toned and lean; I'll be strong enough to answer any call of God and will be taking care of my temple.

LEAN has other meanings as well. I plan to lean into our Father, relying on His Strength and Providence. To do this I need to speak with Him daily, get to Mass regularly, try to add a daily Mass or two to my schedule, Lectio Divina, continue my Adoration hour (it's SO fruitful!), volunteer when needed, practice hospitality. Add these in a little at a time so there's no overwhelm. Make good habits.

It's obvious I need some kind of schedule. There's always appointments to get to, Monica has school, meals and prep time need to be added...it may be challenging but it will be doable.

I also want to blog this journey. Sunday is a good day to do that: one day a week is a good starting goal.

Whew! Exciting plans! I'm a turtle, though, not a hare. Slow and steady wins the race. One goal at a time will be implemented. That way all will be accomplished well. I'll refer to my list of goals often, I think. Otherwise I'll forget my motivation and lose my way. It's a "long and winding road" that leads to God's door, but I'm on the way. One foot in front of the other and I'll finish the course. Walk with me.

Restore: Wonderstruck

Once again, I was wrong. The title of the book is one word. And the next challenge encourages me to find something in the house that needs restoring. There is plenty in this old farmhouse that could use some TLC; the problem is there is no money in the budget to get what is needed to provide it. So this challenge will go unmet.

However, I can meditate on the wondrous work of restoration God has made in my life. He took someone who had given up and raised her head. He took someone who was certain she would be alone always and gave her a family. But more than that, He drew me to Himself. I now have the fullness of faith available in the Catholic Church. I am strengthened through Reconciliation and fed by the Eucharist. THAT is the wonder of restoration!

The Good Samaritan Seen Anew

This is straight from my morning devotions in Divine Intimacy this morning. It was so beautiful I had to share it.

"A certain man went down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and fell among robbers, who also stripped him, and having wounded him, went away, leaving him half dead" (Lk  10:23-37).  That unfortunate man represents each one of us. We too have encountered robbers on our way. The world, the devil, and our passions have stripped and wounded us. Who can say that he does not have in his own soul some wound, more or less deep, left by temptation or sin? But, on our route, there was also a good Samaritan, rather the Good Samaritan par excellence, Jesus, who, moved by compassion for our state, brought us help. With infinite love He bent over our open wounds, curing them with the oil and wine of His grace. The oil represents its gentleness and the wine its vigor. Then He took us in His arms and brought us to a safe place, that is, He entrusted us to the maternal care of the Church, to which He has consigned the price of our ransom, the fruit of His death on the Cross.

The parable of the good Samaritan thus delineates the story of our redemption, a story which is ever in action and which is renewed every time we draw near to Jesus, humbly and regretfully showing Him the wounds of our souls. It is actuated in a very special way in the Mass,  where Jesus presents to the Father the price of our salvation, and renews His immolation for our benefit. We should go to Mass in order to meet Him, the Good Samaritan, to invoke and receive His sanctifying action. The more we recognize our own misery and our need of redemption, the more will Jesus apply the fruits of redemption to us. When He comes to us in Holy Communion, He will heal our wounds, not only our exterior wounds, but our interior ones also, abundantly pouring into them the sweet oil and strengthening wine of His grace.

See what I mean? Beautiful! And it calls to mind one of the songs we used to sing in Summer Break Players, a multimedia performing, traveling group I was in for several years. Basically the youth group for my church, but really cool. I cannot remember at the moment who wrote the song or unfortunately what the title is (hey, it's been 30+ years - I remember the lyrics!); I'll give due credit when I search it out.
Okay, the song is called My Eyes Are Dry by the amazing Keith Green who left us much too soon but is adding a little somethin'-somethin'  to the praise around the Throne.

My eyes are dry
My faith is old
My heart is hard
My prayers are cold
And I know how I ought to be
Alive to you and dead to me.

What can be done for an old heart like mine?
Soften it up with oil and wine.
The oil is you, your spirit of love.
Please wash me anew in the wine of your blood.

Revolving-Door Confessional

My husband and I used to tag-team for the Sacrament of Reconciliation. One would watch the increasing number of little children while the other would enter the confessional. Then, after lucky number one's penance was done, he or she would watch the children so the spouse could be shriven. By the time said spouse was finished, number one's soul did not feel so bright and shiny any longer after dealing with the stresses little children inevitably bring and a return trip to the confessional was often joked about. This is when we began talking about the need for a confessional with a revolving door.

Concupiscence. Paul in Romans 8 describes it well, saying he does what he doesn't want to do, and doesn't do what he would like. We all know it well; but I am a worm and know it better than most.

I went to avail myself of the Sacrament of Reconciliation Saturday. Truly contrite and profoundly grateful for absolution, I said my penance next to my oldest daughter in the back row right which seems to be reserved for penitents in our church. Then, since we were staying for Mass, we moved forward in the church, where I sat contentedly contemplating Jesus on the Cross. Yes, God forgive me, I was looking at the crucifix in church, speaking with my Lord, and perfectly content. Complacent. Complacency does me in every time.

One of the entrances to our church needs repaired; the door slams shut rather than closing slowly and quietly. Most of the people know this, but don't think to catch the door and close it themselves. The third time the door's slam interrupted my reverie my first thought was "Damn it, can't you catch the door?!" My eyes travelled back to Jesus on the cross. I was no longer content, but convicted. My sins, including these just committed, had put Him there. Not only had I used foul language IN CHURCH, but I was being uncharitable to my fellow parishioners (I have a special problem with being charitable and never fail to mention it in the confessional). I felt I should make an about-face and march right back into the booth. Then I saw the Sacristan heading to the back with Father's chasuble. Too late.

Fortunately, these were venial sins and receiving Jesus' Precious Body wiped those sins away. My own contrite heart was fertile ground for His saving action. I thought I had a bright, shiny soul - for ten minutes! Turns out my attitude of heart and mind may have made the time less than that. Concupiscence. I still need a revolving-door confessional.

Worth all the Excitement

We attended Mass as a family...and it was worth all the excitement! The children behaved beautifully. The homily was great. Our Lord is there.

Last Sunday, I went on my own. Totally my fault-I didn't conquer Mt. Laundry. There were no towels to bathe the children, etc. Forgive me for what I have done and for what I have failed to do.

I agreed to use my God-given gifts again in Lectoring. I did that for a Tues eve Mass. So good to be serving God that way once more.

I LOVE the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass.

Too excited to Sleep

It's after 5 a.m. and I haven't slept at all. The house is quiet except for the clicking computer keys and occasionally the bell of a cat. We're going back to Mass tom.....today! after a long time away for various reasons. Going as a family. I can hardly wait.

To see my Eucharistic Lord again....the only other time I remember being this excited was the night before my wedding.